I was lucky enough to spend half my childhood living in Hawaii. While most people visiting will simply regard the islands as their temporary playground, they should remember that people do live here, and you know what? (Some of) Those people are sick of your sh*t. As someone with both the outsider (I wasn’t born in Hawaii) and insider perspective, I see both sides. However, it is possible to have an amazing vacation in Hawaii, without being a “stupid tourist” and maintain respect for our home. So, here is a list of how not to piss off locals when visiting Hawaii.
Respect Hawaiian Culture
Hawaii used to be a thriving, self governing sovereignty. They had a monarch, and were entirely independent culturally and politically from the USA. Of course, that was stolen, but the culture is still alive and sacred today.
Don’t be the idiot who comes here and disregards Hawaiian culture as some kitschy gimmick. It’s not, and doing so will not win you any friends.
Wearing an aloha shirt or a lei is more than okay. Appropriating or mocking the culture, is not.
Don’t Steal Waves
I had to ask my friend about this one, since I myself don’t surf. But, if you are coming to Hawaii, as a beginner or even experienced surfer, you should be mindful of the common etiquette in the water.
Don’t steal waves, especially from locals. If you are a beginner, try not to accidentally cut someone off. I know it’s harder to control what you are doing when you are starting out, but try to be aware of your surroundings and maintain respect for other surfers.
Don’t Call Us All Hawaiian
As a Californian, I understand why mainlanders think that everyone in Hawaii should be called a Hawaiian. A person from California is Californian so this may seem logical.
If you do even a 1 second google search, you will find that Hawaii was its own nation in the past. The word Hawaiian actually refers to the native people and descendants of the indigenous folks who originated here.
Calling everyone here Hawaiian is equivalent, to going to South America, and calling everyone Americans. Or calling everyone in Turkey a turkey. It’s just incorrect, and shows blatant ignorance.
Don’t Drive Like You Have Never Seen a Map
Driving around Hawaii may be one of the most beautiful road trips you’ll ever take, and there can be lots of distractions. While I understand this, it’s still a road, and normal rules apply.
You can’t just slow down, or worse, suddenly break for no reason just because you saw something cool.
And when finding a place to pull over, I don’t mean the side of the road either, unless it’s permitted. There is already congested traffic in Hawaii, and in many areas, there is a one lane highway only. Don’t be the reason to hold up traffic even more.
Also, I understand it’s a new place for you, but Google maps works here just like it does elsewhere. Please use it, and exercise some sense of direction when on the road. People will appreciate it.
Don’t Disregard the Rules
You know that sign that says don’t touch the sleeping monk seals? Well, that means you shouldn’t touch the monk seals.
Also, if the sign says you are forbidden from touching sea turtles, you shouldn’t do that either. If a sign says “no swimming” for your sake, you should probably listen to it.
Rules exist for a reason.
This should be straightforward, but it seems people think rules don’t apply to them on vacation.
These rules are put in place with the protection of animals, the land and people in mind. Be respectful and follow the rules.
Don’t Complain that it’s Not Like the Mainland
When visiting Hawaii, you should realize that these are small islands, located in one of the most remote parts of the planet.
Knowing this, you should expect that things aren’t going to be the same as it is in your hometown in Nebraska, or anywhere else for that matter.
Of course we don’t have all the same food chains and amenities you may be used to back home. It’s an island, and although it’s part of the USA, that fact doesn’t change.
Remember to Tip
I know tipping isn’t customary in most other countries, but not tipping in Hawaii is a huge no no. This goes for anyone visiting any part of the USA really.
However, since Hawaii sees a huge part of its business from tourists, this problem is rampant. Some restaurants even tried to implement automatic tip calculated into the bill, to combat tourists who “forget” to tip. Understandably, this did not go over well, so they got rid of it.
So, when visiting Hawaii, please respect the tipping culture in America, and tip.
If you can’t afford to tip, you can’t afford to dine out.
Don’t Ask if We Have Electricity
This happens more outside of Hawaii. I know it comes from genuinely not knowing, but if you meet someone from Hawaii, don’t ask what it’s like growing up without electricity.
Hawaii is part of the U.S, and even a simple Google search will show you we have sky-high hotel buildings and highways. It’s not the rural and wild island some people may picture in their heads. So of course we have electricity.
While we are at it, don’t ask if there are cars in Hawaii or if we surf to school either (someone really asked me this).
Don’t do it for the Gram
Hawaii is a beautiful place, and no one will blame you for wanting to capture that in your vacation photos.
However, overdoing it will get you a lot of eye rolls real fast. At the very least, don’t block the view or walkway for your makeshift photoshoot.
Odds are, the picture you are desperately trying to take, is a copycat of something circulating on instagram already. Your followers don’t need to see it again.
Stop Trying too Hard
This one comes from a Reddit thread called What Pisses off Locals About Tourists in Hawaii. The one that came up the most, was tourists who try too hard to be local.
Trying too hard to fit in with locals or integrate into the local culture will not gain you any popularity. In fact, most locals don’t want to hang out with tourists anyway.
No matter how cool you think you look, they know you are a tourist. The hang loose t-shirt isn’t fooling anyone.
Don’t be in a Hurry
I learned this quickly when I moved to Hawaii as a child. Things run slowly here, in fact they have even coined the term “Hawaiian Time” to describe the lack of time orientation on the islands.
Expecting things to be fast, and outwardly showing impatience will quickly make you a hated person. People drive slow here, lines move at a glacial pace, heck even construction work takes ages because of Hawaiian Time.
Anyway, you’re on vacation, take it easy and embrace the slow lane.
Leave the Selfie Stick at Home
This might be a personal pet peeve, but honestly if you’re still using selfie sticks, at least don’t smack people with it.
Also don’t block people’s views or the walkway just to get your obnoxious selfie. Thanks!
Don’t Complain About the Food
The food culture in Hawaii may be the most unique of all the 50 states. With that said, no one cares that you think spam is prison food. Either embrace new things or shut up.
Truth is, the food culture in Hawaii is extremely diverse. It’s not one cuisine, but a melting pot of bit and pieces of many cultures.
When visiting Hawaii, if you are open minded to trying the local food, you will definitely find things that you like and won’t find elsewhere. Try mochiko chicken, poke from Ono Seafood, malasadas, and a mixed plate for starters.
Or you can just eat at Hard Rock Cafe and call it a life. Your choice.
Know Your Limits
Every year, a handful of tourists put themselves in dangerous situations and then get into serious trouble.
Every now and then, we hear about another tourists who fell off a hiking trail to their death. Or another tourists who forgot they can’t swim and drowned in Hanauma Bay.
As a rule, you should remember that Hawaii isn’t a giant themepark. You are playing in nature, and the risks are very real.
Don’t come with the mindset that you are invincible. It’s actually more likely that things here are more dangerous than back home.
Don’t Run Your Mouth
Hawaii is not the place to come and run your mouth, even under the influence of alcohol. If there’s anything I learned from growing up here, it’s that people are down to fight – and are good at it.
Even if you think you’re a big shot back home, Hawaii is not the place to test people. Respect the locals, and even if you think you are right in an argument, take the high road.
If you step out of line, you might just get laid out and your vacation will be over. You have been warned.
Use Common Sense
And finally, use your common sense folks. I live across from Sandy Beach, and almost every time I go there, I hear the lifeguard yelling on his loudspeaker at some tourists to get out of the surfbreak.
When visiting Hawaii, please take your safety into your own responsibility and use your common sense. If you see big waves, and lots of signs saying “no swimming”, I think it’s safe to assume you should NOT be swimming, right?
Common sense goes a long way here. And yes, those waves do send people to the hospital all the time.
And that wraps up this long (and whiny) list of how not to piss off locals when visiting Hawaii. I know it may seem long, but a lot of these are easy enough to follow, if you have respect for our state. I promise that following these tips won’t ruin your vacation, it will only make it easier for you to enjoy this tropical slice of heaven.
What’s your favorite thing to do when visiting Hawaii? Let me know below!
AW says
The best advice I see here are to Stop Trying too Hard and to Use Common Sense. I think if you do both then the other tips would naturally fall into place for pretty much anywhere.
I mean, would you run your mouth in a bar or steal a surf if you have common sense or aren’t trying too hard?
Do people living in Hawaii think most tourists are idiots and stupid? I guess I don’t mind but I hope they won’t say it to my face if I mess up.
Jacqueline says
I don’t think the idea is that tourists are stupid. There are millions of people who visit and cause no problems, but one encounter with an annoying or disrespectful one seems to stick in the mind longer. These are also the incidents that make headlines in our local news, so some inherent annoyance towards tourists may exist.
Honestly, that’s a normal side effect in a place that experiences over-tourism, not just in Hawaii.
But of course, if you visit you will feel very welcomed, and find that people are friendly too!
Jose says
Never been there, but I’m excited to be there Friday.
Jacqueline says
I’m exited for you 🙂 Which islands?
Linda says
I love this post! Especially the part about calling the locals Hawaiian! I have to admit, I had no idea and am glad I won’t look like an insensitive person when I revisit. This was a much-needed post ❤️
Jacqueline says
No worries! I fall in the middle, where I see both sides. Some of my friends from Hawaii don’t get why when they move to the mainland, people consider them Hawaiian when they aren’t. But if I didn’t live there, I probably would have assumed the same.
Renata - byemyself says
Such an unusual – and important – post on Hawaii. Actually, it’s quite atrocious how the local culture got destroyed by the US in the past – with no regard for the traditions whatsoever. And even today, it’s treated like some Disney-Beach-Destination. It’s very sad.
Jacqueline says
Yeah it is, we learned about it extensively in grade school and it’s a very heavy topic to grasp at a young age. Really makes you question the ethics of the US government even more.
Antoine says
It’s been long overdue for me to visit your home! 😀 I’ll do my best to not be a Karen or do any sort of cultural appropriation. Jokes asides, I really hope to visit someday (the food seems amazing, is mentioning Spam an offense?)
Jacqueline says
I don’t think you would be a Karen, I think you’d love it! Mentioning spam is not an offense, spam is amaziiiingg.
Mark says
How to not piss off a local
Don’t be white
Yet you a responsibility to know everything about the Hawaiian culture
And don’t come to hawaii
Bob Cliff says
Late to the party, late to comment – timely for current state of tourism as of Jan 2023. Uproar over disrespect of tourist gone viral with posting of urination at Mauna Kea with sign language (middle finger).
Humility, respect, patience, care, generosity, acceptance and meaningful understanding of uniquely Hawaiian society is a far reach for any first time visitor to the islands over a span of days or even weeks. As detailed, this disconnect is further broadened by faceless social media “permission” promoting an “Island Experience”. These challenges seem to be exponentially expanding a genuine “Aloha” divide from contemporary visitors. Understand, most visitors are here for the weather and relaxed atmosphere, with a casual, feign, interest of Hawaiian Culture. It is always fun and exciting to see and experience a foreign culture but most difficult to understand. As a visitor, the best we can do is respect values others may have without judgement or criticism. This would be considered an acceptable outcome when one visitor is need fully replaced by the next.
My experience as a visitor included many walks, bike rides, water excursions (swims) and hikes around Oahu. Neighborhoods of Honolulu, Hawaii Kai, Kialua, North Shore – all most enjoyable and memorable.
I write to speak in response to alleged disrespect conducted by visitors. I understand people make bad choices and need to be called out. There is ignorance in us all. My concern is the acceptable pattern of behavior demonstrated by what is labeled a “homeless” culture in many parts of Oahu. This behavior/culture seems to be most visible to Visitors in Honolulu and surrounding communities. Prevalent Homeless Camps surround Waikiki along Ala Moana Park, Ala Wai, Kalakaua, Kapiolani park beach, Kapiolani Blvd, all around Diamond Head (except within neighborhoods). Many other camps can be cited and seen in most districts of Oahu. This social structure is part of the climate visitors absorb upon arrival to the Island. A simple walk along Kuhio beach often turns into verbal or worse, physical assault from an unfortunate, dejected soul. Visitors are subjected to such torment everyday on the Island. In parks surrounding the Ala Wai, Kapiolani Beach Park or Ala Moana Beach park open urination and deification can be observed as daily behavior. Upon occasion, shower areas, in early morning, may be soiled with feces, condoms, and soiled toiletries.
These are acts and behavior seen by visitors as part of Hawaiian Culture, part of the status quo. Why would it be surprising to see a visitor mimic what is commonly seen where someone may have paid several thousand dollars to visit and vacation on Oahu? I’m not trying to justify unacceptable behavior contradicting social contract. My intent is to question the double standard portrayed by outrage from such sources as “HONOLULU (HawaiiNewsNow) – A Big Island man is publicly apologizing after starting an uproar for posting a video of himself urinating on Mauna Kea” along with government official statements denouncing the same. I believe many of these experiences will continue to perpetuate a willingness “TO GO ELSEWHERE” when decisions for vacation is made from abroad. In this respect, it appears the Hawaiian Culture has indeed advanced her cause to reclaim the island for herself.
Regards, Bob Cliff
Tammie McIntire says
100% Spot on! I have an Airbnb property and I think I’m going to print this list out so they can all see. My last guests really pissed me off when they spilled food and drink all over my new carpet. My carpet cleaners got it out, but seriously people, use some common sense.